Sugar Coated Heart Shaped Pout
by butimbroken
Summary: Buffy/Angel. AU. Buffy finds herself leaving college behind and coming back home. COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

Sunnydale, California was not exactly where Buffy planned to be. She had grown up here, she had graduated from high school, and had never been happier than to move out of the small town and take on the world. She had moved, she had been in her second year of college, she had made wonderful new friends, had so many great memories in the time she was away. Coming back just made her feel more dread than ever.

Xander and Anya had been amazing, they didn't think twice about offering her their guest room, offering to help even get her back to Sunnydale, back to California. She knew they didn't exactly have loads of money laying around so that only made her appreciate them more.

She drove almost straight through until she saw the familiar streets and felt dead on her feet when she finally got to their small house. She'd eaten dinner with them then quickly passed out after thanking them probably five thousand more times.

It wasn't until the following morning when she got around to trying to unpack the car, the piece of junk that she still couldn't believe even made the trip here. It barely had. One of the top things on her list was finding a mechanic to hopefully help out with the damn thing. Buffy began carrying bags and boxes from the trunk, the back seat, the front seat into the house. She hadn't brought a lot but a few of them were on the heavier side and walking back and forth in this heat wasn't exactly her favorite things in the universe at the time.

She had just about finished and was grumbling a few curses about the largest ones still waiting to be brought in when she realized someone was beside her. Stepping back, she looked until she spotted the stranger, which didn't take much effort. "Hi?"

He nodded as a greeting first. "Hi. Do you need some help?"

"Um. No. No, I don't think so."

"You sure? I'm Angel by the way, sorry, don't know where my manners went. I live on the next street over and was coming to return a welder I borrowed from Xander the other day."

"Oh. Well, he left maybe fifteen minutes ago or so but Anya's inside."

"Okay, well thanks."

"Buffy, my name is Buffy. Sorry."

"Buffy. Okay. You sure you don't want help?"

Buffy told him no but when she started trying to get a box to budge she sheepishly called him back. He traded the welder into her hands and easily got the cardboard box from where it was partially wedged in the trunk and carried it behind her. She pointed to the guest room when he asked where to put it then asked her if she was moving in. "Um Temporarily."

"Okay. Well, it was good to meet you, Buffy. Maybe I will see you again soon. And Anya, lovely as always, please pass along thanks again to your husband for me."

OoOoO

The next time she had seen this Angel character was a few days later when she was visiting Giles, a family friend and her old librarian from when she was in high school. He'd shown up and Giles tried to introduce them but she butted in to explain they had technically met before. He spoke a little more about the younger man before excusing himself on a phone call, leaving the two of them alone together in his living room.

"How do you know Rupert?"

Buffy smiled a little. "I grew up here, my first year of high school was Giles' first year as the librarian. We had a strange friendship," she said with a shrug. "He also dated my mom for a little while before they realized they were probably better off as friends."

Angel's lips made a line and his head nodded a little. "I moved here about a year ago. I work in LA but rent is out of control so..." They made small talk for a few minutes before he surprised her. "Would you go out for drinks with me sometime?"

Buffy's eyes popped out of her head. "Um... I'm sorry, I can't." She was sure at any other given time or situation in her life she would have fainted, jumped for joy, something if a man who looked as good as this particular one did had asked her such a thing.

"You can't?" he question.

"N-no."

"Can I ask why not?"

Buffy's mouth opened then closed fast. She blinked and looked away from him. "Um. I'm pregnant," she blurted out. "I don't think that would be a good decision for me."

Not missing a single beat, Angel continued. "Drink doesn't have to mean alcoholic. Do you drink coffee? Hot chocolate? Milkshakes?"

Buffy's head turned back toward him and all she could do was stare for the longest time. "I'm pregnant," she repeated. "That's not a good idea."

Thankfully, Giles returned from his phone call before anything else could be said about it.

OoOoO

Sighing, Buffy made a pouting face at the shelf in front of her. Being short had its perks, not being able to reach things on high shelves at the grocery store was not one of them. With another sigh, she decided to give it one more go... and when she did she suddenly felt a body very close to her. Her eyes drifted upward to watch long fingers grab her desired product and began to pull it down.

"Here."

Of course it was him.

Buffy felt those butterflies kick it into high gear once more as she turned to face him. She swallowed and took the spaghetti sauce from him. "Thank you. The one I wanted was a little out of my reach and I was getting real tired of waiting for an associate to grace me with their presence."

"You are welcome."

He kept staring at her as she went to put the jar in her cart and it made her all the more nervous. "I, uh... Xander is very sweet. Does not cook, Anya either. They pretty much live off of anything you can put inside a microwave. I'm not a great cook myself but real food sounded good."

He looked at the items in her cart, then back at her. "I cook."

"Of course you do," she said before her brain could stop it.

"I could make you dinner sometime. Or, alternative take you to dinner sometimes. Somewhere where they make real food."

"Still pregnant."

"Still asking. Dinner, drinks... a movie, go to a park, have a picnic... monster truck show, football game..." he trailed off.

"I can't."

"Are you married?"

"No."

"Boyfriend?"

"No."

"Girlfriend?"

"No."

"Just don't like me?"

"I... I don't know you."

"And I'm trying to let you?"

"And... I... that's very sweet of you but again... I'm pregnant. Very unplanned. Very... unpleasant currently. The guy is a jerk. My mother is a jerk. My father is a jerk but not due to this, he's been one for a very long time. There's a whole... thing... going on here and I don't think it's a good time to be dating."

OoOoO

Buffy found herself _wanting_ to date Angel O'Roarke. The more she happened to think about him or the few times she had been around him only made her like him more and that only made her angry. She couldn't like someone now, it didn't feel right to be dating one man while another man's child was growing inside of you. Even if that moron was a useless piece of crap.

She'd literally had a two-night stand. She had lost her virginity to someone she liked and she'd found herself pregnant weeks later. He was a tool, he had ruined her whole life at the school after trying to tell him about the baby and made her want to literally be anywhere else on the planet. Dating was not her strong suite. Never had been, the few boyfriends she had in high school sure weren't much of anything either. Parker took the damn cake, though. That was for sure.

And why in the hell this seemingly perfect Angel character was interested in her at all, let alone when he knew she was pregnant bothered her in countless ways. He flirted, he asked a few more times and she had a harder time telling him no each and every single one of them. One day she pretty much snapped on him, way more than she'd intended, and he done his best to avoid her since. And she'd done the same when it came to him.

OoOoO

Standing on the side of the road, Buffy slammed the hood of her car down. She propped it back open then slammed it down again, then repeated one more time for good measure. Her piece of shit car had survived a lot but today of all days it wanted to really break down on her. She wanted to scream, cry, curse... Her hands were shaking as she reached into her purse and pulled her phone out, almost dropping it in the process. She dialed the number for a cab company and then another and another... all telling her they'd come get her but none would be out in time. Not even close to in time.

She was about to go sit in the car and just cry for a moment when a large truck pulled up behind her. She could see who it was before he got out.

"You want me to look at it?" Angel cautiously asked as he walked the short distance from his truck to her.

Buffy ran a hand angrily through her hair. "No. No, I mean I would at any other time probably but whatever is wrong is highly unlikely to be a quick fix and what I need is to get somewhere," she vented.

His forefinger ran over his lips for a moment as he looked from her to his truck. "I could give you a ride."

"Oh. I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to ask for one I was just mad and venting."

"I can give you a ride," he repeated. "It's no trouble. Nothing more than that."

She sighed heavily. "I have a doctor's appointment. And I have to be there. I've been late their max amount of allowed times and I have had to cancel before a few times and if I'm late today then they don't want me to be their patient and I really do like them," she rushed out. "And they are the only option that's less than like an hour and a half away and that makes me very nervous and-"

"I will take you. Just... get what you need and I'll be waiting in the truck."

She watched as he simply turned and walked away. She wanted to cry even more right now. She grabbed her purse and locked the car up before rushing to jump in his passenger seat.

"Where to?"

"Um. Here I'll get the address," she told him then looked it up. She knew how to get there on her own but knew she'd suck at trying to remember street names and pay attention enough to get him there. She watched him put it into his navigation system before pulling back onto the road. "I called a tow truck to come get your car," he told her.

"Th-thank you. For... both, for everything."

He nodded. Her heart as she noticed him trying to look anywhere but at her. The silence in the vehicle didn't help either so she'd been very thankful when he told her she could turn the radio on if she wished. And she very much did wish that and reached over to fiddle with it until she found a song she liked.

When they got to the office, Buffy breathed a sigh of relief. They had made it on time, actually with a handful of minutes to spare. She began thanking him again but found her words trailing off as he shut the engine off and started to get out. "Wha... what are you doing?"

"I figure you'll need a ride home. Thought I'd wait."

"I-in there?"

He shrugged.

"Y-you don't have to do that."

"It's fine. You're wasting time worrying about it. Just go... get checked in. I can find a corner to sit in."

And sure enough that is what he did. He found a corner, grabbed a couple of magazines and sat there reading them as she got checked in. She chose to not sit by him once she had checked in, peed in the cup, and all of that business and opted for her regular seat by the doorway. Every now and then she would glance over but he never returned a look. She was glad her wait was a short one and a nurse came to fetch her soon.

OoOoO

"Are you hungry?" Angel asked her as they settled back in the truck.

She looked over at him and shook her head. Truth was that she was but didn't want to bother him more than she already was.

His hands lingered on the keys before he turned it over. "There's a little diner at the end of the road. I used to stop with my sister after each of her appointments that I wound bring her to back when she was pregnant. It's not the best food I've ever had but it is pretty good."

Buffy's stomach growled and she blushed. She'd been there the last time she'd come out here herself. "I'm fine. Really."

He sighed, starting to pull out of the parking space. "I'm very sorry for pushing myself on you, I wasn't trying to be rude or make you uncomfortable or whatever else. I was interested in you and was just trying to, I don't know, flirt, play around, get to know you. And I am sorry for that. I have been happy to leave you alone and stay out of your way the best that I could, today all I wanted to do was help. You looked like you needed some and it really was no bother. Now, maybe I'm right back to square one and being heavy handed but you _sounded_ like you were hungry the whole way here and that obviously hasn't changed. Now me, I actually haven't eaten all day yet my own self so... there's the diner," he said along the short drive from the office to the diner. He pulled into one of the free spots. "I'm going to go in and make an order, I can get it to go. I can get you something to go if you want. My treat, nothing more than that, doesn't mean anything, life goes back to exactly as it was. Or, if you want to go in and have a meal that is fine, too. I will sit at the counter and will leave you be, won't talk to you or look at you or whatever else."

Buffy let out a huge breath of air she'd been holding in for far too long as she watched him walk from the truck to the door. She really hated this day.

The little bell on the door rang out much louder than she remembered as she stepped inside. Angel was at the counter, looking over a menu and chatting with the woman on the other side. One of the waitresses smiled big at her, waving her toward one of the tables. As promised, he never looked her way and she wondered if he even knew she was there.

At least she did until the waitress came over. She handed a menu and napkin wrapped silverware over and pointed toward Angel. "Honey, the man at the counter let me know on my way over here that he would be paying for your meal and to let you know you can get anything you wanted and not to worry over it." She thanked the woman for that, the menu and gave her drink order before starting to look over the menu.

Her eyes kept drifting to Angel though, watching him ignore her as he drank his cup of coffee on the stool.

After she got her meal order out, Buffy slowly stood up and walked over to Angel. Her hands were tugging on her shirt as she made the short walk over there, nervous habit. You could just barely see the changes in her body right now from the baby growing inside. If you didn't know her or you weren't looking real hard you probably wouldn't notice, if she had on a baggier shirt you wouldn't notice, but she was well aware of the small change. She was nervous as she walked and as she got to him, nervous as she quietly told him it would be okay if he sat at the table with her. "I'm sorry I have been a jerk, not you. You haven't done anything wrong," she told him first. After the invite she tugged at her shirt a little more as she turned, walking back to her seat.

Buffy was sure he was just going to continue sitting there and pretend as though he hadn't even heard her and follow through on the whole won't even acknowledge her presence thing but he wound up standing, one hand going to his cup and he spoke again to the lady behind the counter before coming to join her. He slide easily into the booth seat across from her and stared at the dark liquid in his cream colored mug.

"Thank you again for driving me out here today. And thank you for lunch."

"You are welcome."

"Again, I am very sorry that I haven't exactly been the nicest person in the world to you. It seemed easier... being rude and avoiding you."

"Easier than what?"

Buffy swallowed. "Getting to know you. Liking you. Thinking with the more I knew about you or was around you that the more perfect you kind of seemed."

"And... this is a bad thing?"

She swallowed hard again. "The last guy I liked unfortunately got me pregnant, either the first or second time I'd ever even had sex. With protection by the way, twice over. And yet... here I am. That guy went from a very sweet and charming young man to a total dick before I even knew I was carrying his child and there are no words to describe the level he landed on when that news came out."

"Why am I being lumped into a group with this guy exactly?"

"You're not," she hurried out. "I am sure you and many, many, many other guys out there are not like that. This isn't a whole all men are dogs nonsense talk. It's just... that is a little scary. But more than that, while he is worthy of awards for his doucheness, I am still with his child. I am not happy with who the father is but I can't change that and I found myself in love all the same. And... at the end of the day I think I'm actually happy he showed his true colors and he's made it one hundred percent clear that he is not interested. Like, not only not interested but refuses to even believe it's his and disowns the whole idea of what is happening. And something just... didn't feel right about liking someone in this situation, or dating, or... you know... whatever things a relationship may lead to."

He took a sip of his coffee. While you're pregnant or... like a lifelong thing? Because the baby comes out and it's still another man's."

"I know. Maybe it's all in my head. I'm hoping that once we're not sharing a baby that it won't be so weird and maybe someday I could find someone and settle down and whatever..."

Another sip. "Well, I hope so. I hope someday you find someone good for you, for both of you. It's not on me to tell you your feelings about any of it are right or wrong, I am sure it's a confusing time and again I am sorry if I made that worse."

"You're fine, Angel," she told him just before their food arrived. They both thanked the waitress as she sat their plates down.

"I still think you're interesting. And I still wish I could have the chance to get to know you better. Maybe one day. I'm not a terrible friend to have." Angel shrugged.

"I think that might be nice," she told him softly.


	2. Chapter 2

Buffy noticed Angel talking to Xander a handful of feet away and felt familiar butterflies swarm in her stomach at the sight of him. This whole attempting to be friends with the man she'd been attempting at the past few weeks was going exactly how she had feared in the first place. He had dropped any and all attempts to flirt with her or ask her out again since that morning he'd taken her to the appointment and they had it out over brunch at that diner but she could tell at times he was biting his tongue not to. And the more time she spent with him, the more she got to know him, the harder it was to not fall head over heels for him.

Coming over the table, he smiled at all the ladies and greeted everyone one by one. "Hey Mama, how you feeling?" he asked her then quickly looked at her stomach. "And how's baby?"

Swallowing hard, she tried to answer that everything was fine. When he asked if anyone needed him to grab anything, she asked for some more of these funnel cake fries she was currently obsessing over and stared at his retreating backside.

Willow, who was down for a little over a week while on break leaned over to her best friend. "Why don't you just put yourself and him out of your misery and tell him that you like him already?"

Buffy made a face. "I don't like him... like that."

Now, Willow made a face. She was not impressed with the crappy job of Buffy's attempted lie.

She sighed now. "That's too awkward, Wil. I'm pregnant, going to be pregnant for a long ass time. And then I'm going to be a mom. There's also the fact that I have turned him down over a dozen times-"

"It doesn't seem like it has hurt your chances any," Willow told her quickly. "He still looks at you like you've hung the moon or something."

She usually tried to ignore that very look she was well aware of.

"You can't keep using this whole baby thing as an excuse either. I can't say I know exactly what you're going on but it doesn't mean you have to put your entire life on hold, it's not a bad thing to like the very attractive man across the room."

"Aren't you supposed to like women now?"

"I still have eyes. I know an attractive person when I see one. Hell, I'm sure even if someone were blind they'd see that boy."

Buffy rolled her eyes.

"Besides, I'm pretty sure it's all just your dumb mom in your head about all of it anyway. And given how shitty she's being you need not take any advice from her or let her influence a single thing you're doing with your life."

Buffy couldn't argue with that. A lot of her insecurities about Angel came from all the shit Joyce was spewing at her since finding out about the whole pregnancy. She had a way of making her feel worthless because of this situation. But, it wasn't all Joyce in her head. There was a part of her that truly felt it weird to date while carrying Parker's child. It certainly was waning lately though.

The more time she spent with Angel and the more she got to know him the harder it was to remember why she was reluctant to go for it with him.

OoOoO

The small group sat around the table at the club and just ate and chatted about for awhile. Buffy's mind was having a hard time thinking of anything but him. And of how much she had to do when she got home. She'd finally been able to get into an apartment and was thankful for that. Xander and Angel had helped move her things out of Xander and Anya's the other day but she was still working on getting things organized.

Just as she was finishing her last treat, she noticed Harmony come up from behind and begin talking to Angel. She asked him to dance and Angel smiled a little and told her that he didn't dance as a rule. She pushed him for a few other options and he ran out of polite ways to turn her down so finally got up from his seat and went with her.

Willow kept her mouth shut but what she wanted to say was written all over her face.

OoOoO

Buffy didn't know what she was doing as she walked back into The Bronze. She'd decided to leave, got outside, hated the fact that Angel was in there still sitting with Harmony as she basically threw herself at him and quickly turned on her heel and was marching back inside.

"Angel?"

He turned slightly in the chair. "Buffy? You okay?" he asked easily.

" . My car won't start. I was wanting to ask you if you would take me home," she came up with.

"Sure," he said without hesitation. She was thankful he didn't ask her why she wasn't asking Willow or Xander or one of the others for a ride. He spoke with Harmony for a moment more then made sure Xander noticed him leaving before walking with her to the back door and out into the parking lot. "You want me to look at it? I can try and get it started for you, or I can come back and see what I can do."

Buffy let out a huge breath. She didn't know what had come over her. "No," she breathed. "My car is fine. I lied. I'm sorry."

He stopped in his tracks and looked at her. She thought she saw a glimmer of hope flash in those dark brown eyes of his but he said nothing, he went back to walking over to his car and opened the door for her.

She wasn't sure but him not commenting on it almost made her feel more embarrassed. He didn't call her out on it then, or as they started the drive from the small club to her new apartment complex.

"I'm sorry," she finally breathed out just as they were pulling into the parking lot of the apartments. "That was stupid. Can we just chalk being jealous of Harmony to some crazy pregnancy hormones or something?"

"You have no reason to be jealous of Harmony."

"Normally, I would see that." One had went to her stomach. She had a little bump now, if someone didn't know her they might not even think anything of it but otherwise it was pretty evident. "But... she's pretty and I feel very... _not_ lately. She's not carrying around a child and tons of wild baggage either. She can just be pretty and flirt and not worry about all the things I do all live long day. She can like you and not worry, not have turned you down many times over... you know... things like that."

His jaw locked. He was in one of those not daring to say something modes.

She sat in silent, nearly staring at him the whole time, almost daring him silently to say what she knew he wanted to. Instead, he finally just said, "I'm not interested in Harmony."

"Okay," she whispered. He asked if she wanted to be walked to her door but she declined, unsure if she could hold it together any longer, and certainly not if he did that. Angel promised that her car would be waiting in the parking lot for her when morning came.

OoOoO

Two weeks later, Buffy found herself in another one of these moments with Angel. She'd excused herself from the group as they sat in the movie theater when what was happening on the screen hit too close to home. She hated that it bothered her but it did. She watched the characters in the show together as they went to doctor's appointments and planned for the baby the story line called for and it just got to her.

Of course, Angel was the only one who noticed what was really going on and of course, he was the one to follow her out a few minutes later to check on her.

"I'm fine, I promise," she told him, leaning against the large poster hanging up behind her. "Its just one of those things that trigger me I guess," she tried to laugh. "Sometimes I wish I had that. I hate going to the appointments alone, I always think how nice it must be to have someone there with you, holding your hand, sharing the worry or the excitement. I hate that I worry about how in the world I'm going to do all of this alone. How much he or she will miss out on not having that other parent."

"You know you're not alone. You have a very good number of people who are always going to be there for you and he or she in there is already very loved by all these same people."

"I know and that helps, but... it's different."

He nodded and took a few steps around the little hallway they were in. When he came back the same pathway, he sighed and leaned back against the wall mirroring her. "I feel like I'm going to put an end to this little friendship things we've had going on but... you kind of have someone here willing to make sure you have all of that," he told her gently.

"You were interested in going on a date with me."

"And that's where that ends? I don't think it gets to work that way."

"Why not?"

Angel shrugged. "Well, it's easy to be interested in someone. Then, whatever extra stuff maybe they're carrying around you kind of got to take on too if you want to make something out of it. Someone couldn't just date you and keep you versus the baby as a separate thing. It's a packaged deal, kind of got to be all in or nothing. It may not work out in the end, sure, but you can't go in with any other kind of mentality."

"And you were okay with that? Really?" she couldn't help but ask.

"I don't see why not. I like you, that's not exactly a secret," he told her. "I have very much come to care a lot about you, and I care a lot about your tiny little human in there. Whatever you needed... I'd do my best to make sure you had it. You say you wish you had someone being there with you through this whole ordeal... and it's crappy that the person who should be there isn't, but he isn't your only option in this world. You wish you had someone to be there... appointments and whatever... and you can. It doesn't have to be me either but... hey,_ it's there_... but it can be_ someone_. You just got to give someone the chance. If you want to."

OoOoO

Buffy's knee was bouncing nervously as she sat in the waiting room. She hadn't had an appointment in awhile and hadn't minded that. Doctor's offices always gave her the willies. She was excited for today but it was nerve wracking all the same. She tried to will her knee to quit as she grabbed into her bag, pulling her phone out to try and distract her as she waited.

It was a few minutes later when she felt someone sit beside her and her breath hitched in her throat as she saw Angel. He put his large hand on her leg and the bouncing stopped. "What are you doing here?" she asked.

He sat back. "I figured you could use some moral support."

She was about to say something when her name was called. She looked over her shoulder to the nurse at the door then back at him.

"It's okay, I'll wait right here."

Buffy stood, letting out a deep breath before asking him to come with her instead.

"You sure?"

She nodded. "Please?"

"Okay," he said and stood up as well, following behind her.

Getting to the ultrasound room, Buffy got all set up and was asked by the nurse if she wanted to find out the gender today. "Yes," she answered quickly. She couldn't imagine not wanting to personally.

Angel put his hands inside his pockets and stood beside her when she waved him closer. The young woman walked her through everything she was doing, measurements, checking organs, fingers and toes. It wasn't until the end when she began checking for the gender and it only took a quick glance to know there was a little boy brewing in there.

Buffy let out another deep breath. She'd had a feeling it was a boy, and felt almost relieved with the news for some reason.

OoOoO

Angel had stayed with her for the rest of her appointment as well, going to the other room down the hall to speak with the doctor and nurses. She'd been grateful that she really didn't have many symptoms so far... she was bigger in many areas as she reached this halfway point but she'd skipped morning sickness, hadn't had any pain, heartburn hadn't reared its head as of yet, no swelling... And there were no complaints from her on any of that. The easier this went the happier she knew she'd be.

Angel also followed her from the office back to the little diner once she was done. She didn't really have a want to do some big party gender reveal thing and simply let it be known in text messages and on social media as they waited for their order.

"So, are you happy with the news?"

Buffy nodded. "Yeah, actually. I kept thinking it'd be a boy and I thought that might be easier to be honest. I was a hellion of a child and couldn't imagine having to deal with some mini-me," she told him. "It'll be nice to finally be able to buy more clothes and stuff, too. I've gotten some 'gender neutral' stuff but now I don't really have to worry so much about it. That seems nice," she laughed a little. "And I can start thinking more about names and see if anything really starts to fit. I started a list but didn't really like it." Buffy held up one of the pieces of paper she'd gotten today from the office. "It gives suggestions for fining the perfect name... suggests looking at baby name books, going through family history... Ugh. I tried that. Not a fan of names in my family line, let me tell you."

Somehow during the conversation it led to Angel talking about how his parents had adopted him and changed his name when it was finalized, and mentioning how his middle name was after his father and grandfather... and how it had a long line of history in his own family.

As soon as he'd said it she'd had a hard time thinking of anything other than Connor to fit.


	3. Chapter 3

Buffy wasn't one hundred percent sure as to what happened... Angel had helped her go pick up a set of end tables that she'd found listed online, still trying to get her apartment set up to her liking, and she was thanking him as she saw him to the door when she found herself moving toward him without any warning. She could feel his surprise as her lips met his, but it took half a second for it to fade away and for him to relax.

Buffy moved another step closer and she felt his hands gently fall to her waist as the kiss deepened. She felt a punch of heat hit her as his tongue licked at her lips, asking permission that she happily granted, opening her mouth to let his wet tongue met hers. Fingers wrapped from her waist up to her back, lightly dancing around her spine as he pulled her even closer.

Buffy had only recently begun to notice the random fluttering feelings of the growing little boy in her belly. As her stomach pressed into him, Buffy felt those now becoming familiar taps go wild and she felt herself starting to blush. She broke the kiss but it only lasted a moment as he captured her back up quickly.

Buffy moaned, he felt and tasted too good. No one should be this damn addictive she'd thought just before his free hand also moved away from her hip and she felt his flat palm come to rest low on her stomach. A few more hard kicks came and then everything seemed to still again as if he were content now.

Once they broke apart again, Angel took a step back and she watched as he lightly sucked his lips back in for a moment, as if trying to keep the taste of her lingering just a moment longer. She was more than half tempted to do the same, already missing him.

Not really knowing what to do, Buffy just stared at him with her dazed eyes, trying to calm her breathing until he cleared his throat and took another step backward. "Alright. Well. I should go," he finally said. "If you need anything else... I'm... around..."

Buffy just nodded and stared after him as he started walking back toward the small parking lot.

OoOoO

Three more related incidents happened before Buffy got Angel to ask her one more time exactly what she'd spent months being mad at him when they first met. He'd ask her to join him for dinner and had expected that to mean he was taking her out to some nice restaurant but when the night came he'd surprised her with a trip to the grocery store so she could pick out ingredients for them to make something together back at his place.

Buffy found herself being more excited by this prospect and linked her arms with his as they made their way around the large store as she thought of what exactly she wanted tonight.

Buffy was grabbing two of the last items they needed while Angel was a few feet down from her when she heard an older woman start talking to Angel about how his "wife" kept grabbing her attention, that the woman thought she looked "absolutely glowing." Buffy's head turned as he smiled and agreed with her.

It didn't pass her by that he didn't correct the whole wife comment. She was sure he just didn't want to make a big deal of it but it still made her heart skip a little.

The woman began to ask Angel more questions about the baby, if it were a boy or a girl, how far along "they" were... and without missing a beat at any point he answered easily. Angel helped her grab a box that was just a little out of her reach then Buffy smiled at them both as they came closer.

"I was just telling your husband how beautiful you looked," the gray haired woman told her, patting her arm.

"Thank you. Most of the time I don't really feel it, kind of feel like a whale already," Buffy told her with a laugh.

"I remember those days. I had six kids and it felt like I grew twice my size with each one of them."

"Oh, wow. I'm not sure how to even handle the one."

"You'll figure it out," the woman told her with a smile. "I had better go find my husband, he gets worried I'll wind up lost in here," she said with a shake of her head. "Take care mom and dad, you have the best road waiting for you."

Angel waited until she got around the corner to shrug at her. "Sorry, I didn't really know what to say about..."

Buffy smiled and kissed him quickly. "That's fine," she whispered. For whatever reason it made her quite happy that he hadn't corrected the old woman about any of it, that he hadn't taken that extra moment to explain that he wasn't married to her or that he wasn't the father to the baby in question.

While waiting in line, Buffy sighed, leaning back against him while his hands came around to cradle her stomach.

OoOoO

Buffy enjoyed watching him move around his large kitchen, more in how he'd find little ways to always be touching her or just to be near her. Setting the timer as he got everything into the oven, they finished with the appetizers and sides and then there was just waiting for everything to be done left to do.

Angel cleaned up a little while her eyes just drifted around the house. She had only been here twice before and never for very long.

Looking over his shoulder as he turned the faucet back off and dried his hands he invited her to go pick out a movie they could watch if she wanted. He had a rather impressive collection she found, her fingertips dancing over the covers as she read off names and tried to decide what she might be in the mood to watch.

OoOoO

Buffy playfully swung her legs up into his lap. Angel smirked and she watched as he carefully removed the heels she'd been regretting putting on and let them drop down to the carpeted floor. His large hands began massaging her tight covered toes and feet as if it were the most natural thing in the world while they continued to watch the movie together.

"So what's wrong with you?" she finally asked, making him chuckle and shrug. "You're too perfect."

"I don't know."

"You should have some fancy trophy wife, two point five kids the whole picket fence thing going on..."

"What can I say? I have this thing where I get all hung up on tiny, mean, pretty pregnant blondes who want nothing to do with me."

Buffy tried not to smile. "Yeah, I guess that would be a problem."

OoOoO

The movie ended not too long after they had finished eating and having dessert. Angel sat with her cuddled up to him until it ended before he began cleaning up, he refuse to let her help with any of the dishes but she put their leftovers away despite any of his protests about that so she'd at east feel somewhat helpful.

Angel moved the curtain to the window about the sink for a moment while he was working on emptying the sink then back at her. "I'll have to find what in hell I did with my umbrella, it's starting to rain after all."

Buffy bit her lip, watching him for another few moments as she thought going back to her apartment right now was one of the last things she wanted to do right now. "Angel?"

"Yeah?"

"Do... do you think we could watch another movie?" she asked nervously. "I mean, if you have an early day or something tomorrow I understand... or if you just have had enough of me for-"

"If you want to," he cut her off. "I figured you'd wanna go home."

Buffy shook her head.

"Okay," he said softly. "Choose anything you want then."

Buffy started it without him but it wasn't long before he was done with clean up duty and back beside her. Buffy happily curled back up with him, grabbing a throw blanket from one of his chairs and covering them up while she quickly caught him up on what he'd missed so far.

OoOoO

A loud clap of thunder had Buffy bolting upright. Smoothing out her hair, she looked around the unfamiliar room she woke up in. It was dark but she could kind of see around between the opened door and light coming in from the hall, the blue light from the large fish tank along one wall and the flashes of lightening as they came. She yawned, trying to remember when she must have fallen asleep.

Needing very badly to pee, she slipped out of the bed and quietly moved across the floor, out into the hallway and making her way to the bathroom. She found the house mostly dark and quiet, she checked the time on the clock radio in the bathroom after she was done and washed her face. She snooped around his bathroom trying to find an extra toothbrush and was about to give up right before she found one tucked away underneath his sink. Doubting he would mind, she opened it and tried cleaning herself up a little more and waking herself up more in the process before she turned the light off and went back toward the bedroom.

Bypassing Angel's room, she went to the other opened door and peeked inside to see if he was in there.

Buffy tip-toed into the room toward his sleeping form. "Angel?" she whispered. Trying again, she shook him a little. The third time she also raised her voice a little and he started to stir.

Blinking his eyes a few times, he finally looked up at her. "Hey," he greeted, his voice rough, still full of sleep. "You want me to get dressed and take you home?" he asked.

Buffy shook her head, now hung up on the "get dressed" part of his question. She could tell already he hadn't had a shirt on but suddenly wondered what else he might not be wearing. "Why aren't you in your own bed?" she couldn't help but ask.

He shrugged, trying to sit up and lean back against the headboard. "My bed's more comfortable. You fell asleep during the movie and didn't want to wake up so I figured I'd just let you sleep. It was hailing and rain started pouring earlier too so I doubted you wanted to be out in that just then, too."

"Oh," was all she could think of to say, still wondering what he was laying there in. If anything.

"Do you need something? I can get you something to eat or drink or whatever if you want."

Buffy shook her head. She bounced from one foot to the other for a moment and fidgeted with her fingers before asking if she could lay with him.

"Yeah," he drawled out slowly before saying he should go find some pajamas pants, though. Buffy shook her head again and lifted the comforter back enough for her to slip under it. Angel's arms were around her within a second, pulling her to him. Buffy let out a happy sigh as her head pillowed against him, one leg curling up over his body. Buffy felt her heartbeat pounding in her chest as one warm hand slid up her leg to come rest on her thigh.

Buffy's fingertips drew imaginary designs across his bare chest as she tried to sort through the racing thoughts going through her head as she laid there beside him. As if he could read the, Angel whispered assurances that he hadn't asked her here tonight to get her in bed. "I know," she whispered back to him. She never once questioned his motives about tonight and knew he wasn't going to push something like that.

"That said, I'm not going to complain about getting to fall asleep holding you."

OoOoO

It started out hesitant but soon everything felt desperate and needy. Together they had slept peacefully tangled up in one another through the night but as morning hit, rays of sunshine floating in through the cracks in the blinds, Buffy felt as though the earth around them shifted somehow. Her chin had tilted up to see if he was awake and she'd smiled finding his dark eyes looking down at her. She'd pushed up to kiss him and then something took hold of her making her just not want to stop.

Angel's hand tangled up in her hair, pulling her more on top of him. Buffy's hips moved softly as their mouths continued their dance together and she nearly squeaked when she realized what exactly she kept feeling underneath her.

Breaking the kiss, Angel panted a few times, his eyes squeezing shut. "I should get up," he told her.

Buffy leaned back into him, capturing his lips, letting her tongue slip back inside his warm mouth. Angel groaned, flipping them over, taking care to not put too much weight on her. Buffy grabbed at his hair as he began teasing the side of her neck with little nips on the sensitive flesh.

"You're making it very hard to keep my perfect gentleman nature in check," his voice rumbled against throat.

Buffy moaned, his tone sending shivers all through her. "Angel," she whispered, "I want you to touch me."

Not needing to be told twice, his hands started at the hem of her dress and eased it up higher and higher until it was off and out of the way. Her nipples were already pebbled inside her lacy black bra and he looked hungrily at her as he gazed over them, over her naked, swollen stomach, down to her tiny matching panties. His eyes trailed back up and he swallowed. "Buffy? You sure about this?"

"Yes," she breathed out just before a moan fell from her lips once more as his thumbs brushed over her nipples, his palms framing her ribs as they moved. She whispered his name as he began making circles against the fabric.

After he made quick work of getting the bra off of her and flung across the room to parts unknown, Buffy began mirroring his movements, her eyes wide as she would circle, flick and pinch his own nipples in response to everything he was doing to her. After his hips had jerked and ground into her, she felt his hands flee and become replaced with his mouth. Her body arched into him, her hands finding their way back to his dark hair as he teased her.

His teeth barely bit down on her and that slight bit of pain that shot through her made her breathless. "More," she barely made out as he switched to her other breast, his mouth sucking her entire nipple into his mouth, his tongue flicking against the pink tip. He released her with a wet sounding "pop" before blowing air on both wet spots and making her shiver.

Not wanting to in any way whatsoever, but unable to stop it it seemed, Buffy's thoughts drifted to Parker for a moment and her two times in bed with him... and even some of the make out sessions she'd had with other boys. Nothing like this had ever happened in any of those situations, no one had made her feel like this. No one had touched her like this before. Parker was very much wham, bam kind of guy and she wasn't sure she knew what she was doing with Angel right now.

"Angel?"

He kissed his way up her collarbone, neck, lips. "Buffy?"

"I-I don't... I've..."

He lifted away from her, she could feel a slight tremble in his muscles as he put his weight on his arms and kept himself from touching her. "You okay?"

"I've only ever slept with Parker," she rushed out.

"I know."

"And I'm pregnant."

He almost smirked. "I know. Hate to tell you but it's not exactly hidden." She blushed a little. "Do you want me to stop?"

"No," she breathed out. "I just... I... I don't know what I'm doing and you very much do and I'm scared."

He bent to kiss her. "I promise I'm not so scary," he whispered back to her.

She almost laughed. He didn't know how terrifying he was obviously. Her heart was already done for, she thought it had been for awhile now... she just hadn't wanted to admit it. She wanted him more than she'd ever wanted anything, save for the baby growing inside of her that she loved with all she had, and hardly meaning just right now.

Angel continued to kiss her... her lips, back down her body, taking great care in loving on where her little boy rested that she almost cried. Not for the first time she wished it was him, she wished she'd been with Angel first, that she was with his child and not Parker's. Not for the first time she prayed that he could be that in all the ways except for the DNA, that he could be hers for as long as time might allow.

She knew that was probably just the crazy talking but it was how she felt. He made her fall - fast and hard. It was as if somehow he was some missing piece to her life she'd finally found.

Buffy's thighs squeezed together, feeling his mouth on her again and her eyes rolled back into her head at the contact. His tongue lapped at her, flicked, circled her into a frenzy. His mouth sucked on her clit until she was back in a daze and screaming, her hands grabbing at him, both pushing and pulling at him unsure of what she needed.

Angel's fingers slipped inside of her as his mouth worked her bundle of nerves and she came apart, her fingers fisting into the sheets, body arching against him even as he did his best to hold her in place, drawing out every single shiver, scream and tremble out of her until she had to swat him away for a moment to breathe.

Buffy still groaned at the loss once he chuckled, taking the hint and pulling away from her. When he kept going she looked at him confused as to why he was now out of the bed. "Where are you going?" she panted out.

He smirked again and before she knew it she was lifted into his arms like she was nothing. "Taking you to my bed so I can have my way with you."


	4. Chapter 4

After that night, it seemed nearly everything in her life started to suddenly change. Morning eventually came and Angel had sat up in the bed beside her, shifting off to the edge as he prepared to stand but then he paused, slightly looking back over his shoulder. "I know with everything else going on that you see this as the worst possible time to want to be with me," he'd told her. "And I know you don't want to hear this either, but I want you to know that I do want to be with you. Not just last night, and not just in my bed... I want to be with you, Buffy Summers. I'm pretty sure that I started falling in love with you the second I even laid eyes on you."

It made her terrified, but she knew she couldn't keep pretending like she didn't feel the same toward him, either. As terrified as she was to be with him, losing out made her all the more scared to think about. Maybe how they came together wasn't the ideal version she had always imagined in her head, but many things in her life didn't exactly go according to plan and that didn't always mean something bad she had quickly thought.

Not for the first time.

Angel had quickly become the most important person in the world to her, save for the little one still growing inside of her. He was always there for, no matter what she needed. She'd never felt happier, more loved in her entire life. Angel made her feel safe. He came with her to every appointment after that, he had taken her home with him one week earlier on in the start of this new relationship to meet his family and a good number of his childhood friends. She had attempted to try and bridge the gap between her and her own mother but once she mentioned anything about Angel, Joyce had gone on a rampage all over again, telling her how stupid she must be to be with someone right now, calling her a whore and a dozen other things before Angel had all but ripped the phone away from her and went off on Joyce. They'd only spoke one time since then and it was very tense.

Angel's family had been he complete opposite, she had loved getting to know them, how they didn't bat a damn eyelash when it came to her. They treated her like family the entire time she was there with them and every single day since. Both of his parents checked in with her almost daily, they called, texted, video chatted, e-mailed... they asked how she was, how the baby was. They'd asked if it was okay if they got things for the baby and they had, a number of times she'd gotten boxes delivered from them. They had a few things set up at their own house for when they felt comfortable coming out to visit. Hell, they had even asked if it was okay if they called themselves grandparents.

It didn't take much to see where Angel got many of his own traits from.

Ninety nine percent of her was in love with all of it, but that one tiny bit had her sometimes thinking she was going to be too overwhelmed with everything. Her own family had turned their backs on her, and these people who didn't even know her very well, who weren't her blood were everything to her... first with her friends, then there was Angel, and on to his family. It was a lot to wrap her head around at times.

OoOoO

Not once did Angel ever correct anyone, if he was referred to as a husband or expecting father or anything along those lines he never missed a beat. Not with people at the doctor's office, with the slip of the tongue even their closest friends would make, random strangers in a store or at the movies, or when they were out to eat.

The only time it seemed to have ever given him any sort of pause was the night when she slipped her own self and referring to him as "daddy" when she was talking to her jumping stomach. She could picture it clearly even now weeks later, how he'd completely stilled, his eyes just a tiny bit wider than normal. She'd jumped into trying to apologize. "I didn't mean to say that, I'm sorry," she'd told him, blushing slightly, mortified that she'd done that.

"It's okay," he promised her softly. and went back to rubbing her stomach as it would rise up with random kicks and moving body parts.

But she found herself stuck on it, on how it made her heart jump to think of him like that without even really meaning to. Of course he'd made it clear he wanted to be with her despite the fact she was having a baby with another man, he had made it clear he wanted to be with her after the baby was born, that he wanted to be there for him... but it was something they didn't really have figured out entirely, either.

Buffy watched as he played with the dancing infant in there, telling a quick story to her stomach before she reached out for him.

"You look freaked out," he told her, pulling himself up higher on the bed so he could properly cuddle up to her.

Her eyes trailed down his arms, which were now wrapped around her, holding her to him. "I told him you were his dad."

Angel seemed to think about what exactly he should say. "I don't think he will remember."

"I know," she said rolling her eyes and relaxing a little. "It's just... that's not really something we've gone over."

"True," he said slowly. "I mean, I think some of what's going on goes without saying but I understand where you're coming from. And it's okay, Buffy. It doesn't have to be a big deal, I promise, not if you don't want it to be."

"B-but what if... what if... I do?" she nervously asked.

"What if you want it to be a big deal?"

Buffy nodded.

"Then that's more than okay, too. I'm here, I'm not going anywhere."

"But... I mean... you really want to be... dad? It's one thing us being together now but we don't know what's going to happen when he's actually here. And it's not your responsibility Angel."

"Pretty sure I long since made it part of my responsibility, Buffy."

"You know what I mean."

"I do, but what I said stands. I love you, I love him. I will be whatever you will let me be here. I can't promise you everything will be smooth sailing or we will always know what we are doing, but I want to be here through any and all of it."

"You want to seriously raise this kid with me?" she questioned.

"Pretty sure that goes without saying but I will say it anyway. I want to be a family with you, with him. The whole thing."

"Feeding, dirty diapers, lack of sleep..."

Angel chuckled a little. "Yep, all of that. And loving his mama, loving him, singing him to sleep, walking around town as a little perfect family with him in a stroller just taking in the world, going on little trips to places together... All the things. Eventually the truth is going to have to be out there of where he came from and that stinks but it's important, but that factor of Parker isn't the end of the world either. And I'd like to help prove that. Be what you need, what he needs, the best that I can..."

OoOoO

Angel had somehow convinced her to even move in with him just about a week before her due date. In a single days' time he ad their small team of friends had her completely out of the apartment and set up in his house. Hell, even the baby had his room set up by the end of the day as well as one of the corners in his-turned-their bedroom set up with a small bassinet and changing-slash-feeding station.

She had cleared it with him about the idea of using Connor as the name for the baby as she'd never been able to find anything else she was anywhere near drawn to as it. She felt guilty and let him know it was okay if he said no though, that she would find something else in case he wanted to save it for his "first" child and he'd told her that's exactly where it would be going.

As her due date came, all seemed to be going fine... other than she felt like a whale and was quite over the whole thing. Thankfully, her doctor had taken pity on her and agreed to induce her in the event the little one hadn't come on his own.

Angel made their last day as just the two of them perfect, lacking surprise there. He'd made sure she relaxed, that the house, the bags, the car was in order. A few hours before they had to actually make it to the hospital they stopped by her favorite little diner in town.

There was such a mixture of emotions floating inside of her, and between the two of them as they made their way from the parking lot of the diner to the one of the Sunnydale General Hospital. She was excited, scared... ready... and yet so far from it all at the same time.

After telling the nurses that Angel was staying through the night, they'd gotten a bed rolled in for him. She had to watch a birthing video - which in no way helped anything at all as far as she was concerned, fill out a million forms, go over her information about five times but finally, about two hours since even getting here, they started the medicine to get her labor moving along.

Through the night Buffy didn't progress much, she could feel faint contractions but they really felt like nothing more than cramps during her regular period. What bothered her most actually was being woken up every four hours for vitals to be taken, having enough trouble calming her nerves down to even attempt to sleep then add in as soon as she finally started to drift a nurse would come along was testing her patience.

Giles, Willow, Anya, Xander and the others came bristling through come morning to check on her. Her doctor swung by to check on her and to break her water, soon she had the epidural and then it was just a waiting game.

When the actual time came, Buffy's eyes widened as she watched the nurses set up around her and get her into proper position. Angel kissed her forehead and told her he loved her and everything was going to be okay, then he laughed with her as she was too numb to even feel whether she was even pushing or not. The nurse told her she was actually doing more when she laughed then when she tried, but either way she couldn't feel a thing going on down there.

Angel held her hand and coached her along despite the fact she couldn't feel anything, probably better than anyone else who was in the room with them. He cut the umbilical cord when prompted, took a million photos during labor and as they went to get the baby's statistics. She hated being away from him, from either of her boys, but she loved watching him interact with the tiny infant as he took a few more snaps before coming back to her. "You did perfect, mama," Angel whispered.

OoOoO

Two days into their stay at the hospital and Angel had rushed back with some take out containers from Olive Garden which she had insisted she needed, when before he could even set everything down, a nurse was trying to hand him a clipboard. "What's that?" he asked over his shoulder.

"It's for the birth certificate," the nurse told him then began to explain what all he needed to do, where to sign... and then he was looking over at her. "Let me get you a working pen though, I almost forgot," the older woman said and walked to the other side of the room.

He looked confused and whispered her name.

"You don't have to sign it if you don't want to," she told him quietly.

He paled a little and she couldn't blame him. They had established that he wanted to be the father figure in Connor's life but actually being made legal was another thing all together and that had not once really been fully been discussed. He'd mentioned maybe down the road he could adopt Connor if she was okay with it but had made sure to tread very lightly even on saying anything like that in passing, and not all that long ago...

The nurse came back with a pen and Angel slowly sat down on the edge of the bed she was laid down on with as she fed Connor. She could see his hand shaking slightly, and could tell the exact moment when he also noticed O'Roarke being listed letter by letter in the boxes for the last name.

"Are you sure?" he'd barely choked on, looking over his shoulder. "Because you know you don't have to... I mean, I'm here no matter what. You know that."

She nodded. "If it's okay with you anyway," she whispered. "I can change it if it's too much, Angel..." Nothing else hadn't felt right. Leaving the father blank, putting Parker's name anywhere on there, even naming him a Summers didn't feel right somehow.

"No," he breathed out. "I just wasn't expecting..." he trailed off, as he started to sign and date everything, put down the information the pages asked then handed it back over.

"You should get a social security card in the mail for him in the next couple of weeks, you'll have to go to your local health department or order a birth certificate online though," she started to tell them. Then she was gone again a few moments later and they were able to actual talk in private about what in the hell just happened.

OoOoO

On the third day, Buffy was so excited to finally be released and they would get to go home. In many ways she found that almost a bigger moment than many others that had happened the past few days. It made it seem a little more real somehow, that they would be out of the comfort of the hospital, no longer having a team of people around to try and guide them through all of this... no, just get in your car and go be parents basically.

Angel made what felt like a dozen trips back and forth to the car carrying out their bags, gifts they'd had been given from friends, the endless amount of bags of endless supplies the hospital had given them to take home... But finally it was just them, and she and Connor were placed in a wheelchair together for the trip to the front doors while Angel went to bring the car around.

He hopped out to help her into the backseat, not ready to be that far away from the little one yet, and the nurse got Connor safe and sound in the car seat and wished them luck. Then they were making their way back home... ready to start this new journey.

**The End.**


End file.
